All the Songs and All the Stars are Yours

I have to kiss you. It's as simple and as complicated as that.

but I'm hoping at the gates, they'll tell me that you're mine

It's at that horrible point where I sit awake at five in the morning in complete darkness, save for the laptop screen, and see your face painted inside every song I listen to. I squeeze my eyes as tight as possible until spiders made of fractured light are crawling in the darker space behind my eyelids. This is the horrible point where I flirt with regretting all that I said and wanting desperately to say more. I'm trying to recapture that moment that was so the same three years ago while lying to myself about nothing having changed at all. I'd gladly say it all again. I hope you'd listen again and maybe let me hug you longer this time. But then again, I think I was the one who pulled away first. I should have breathed you in for as long as I could. Because now I'm breathless, but in the worst way possible. Everything is muddled at five in the morning.

via *

midnight musings III

-I want to fill my room with a bunch of candles, all burned down to different widths and lengths.

-I have the hardest time spelling the word recipe. (I'll be honest about spelling it wrong here the first two times)

- Just because I'm an English major does not mean I don't have a plan. And I know that I should be used to hearing the question about what I intend to do with my major, but it does not get any less discouraging with every time people ask me. Then you throw on telling me that getting a Masters in Creative Writing will do nothing for me. Thanks a heap. Excuse me for doing what I love and working my ass off.

- Every time I hear Lana del Rey singing I calm down instantly. That voice is like my own blood rushing through my ears. 

-Holding out for a British man, I've decided. Or Leo Dicaprio. Whoever comes first.
- I feel nothing like that romantic girl I used to be. I thought I'd always be her.
-I don't miss that girl much.

via *

midnight musings II

-I feel paralyzed when I write sometimes and I'm not entirely sold on what I've written. I realize first drafts can't be perfect.

-This scares me. I'm a perfectionist. It scares me when my words aren't perfect.

-You know what helps? Music. 

-Cliches are cliches for a reason. They are true.

-Without music, I believe, we would all feel paralyzed. 

-We would feel lost.

-We wouldn't breathe.

-All we can do is keep breathing

-I hope everyone has something they can love like I love words.

-I hope everyone has a celebrity they can look up to. Or if not a celebrity, someone with influence. 

-Pop culture is a part of us. It's time to accept that.

-Ever let your past come back at 12:05 and keep you up at night? 

-Sometimes it's nice to sit and think the past through.

-Even past that is re-imagined is true to you. It becomes your history. 

-I love personal histories

-I am a collector of lives.

-I want to hear every single story.

via Tumblr

midnight musings

-I love being so excited about a new part of a story you're writing that you can't sleep at night.

-I hate being so excited about a new part of your story that you can't even write it down because thoughts are coming too quickly and too powerfully.
-sometimes i get scared to write because I don't want the first draft to be bad. so I just don't write.
-that is no good.

-memories sting in the best of ways, don't they?

-as cliche as it is, I adore Hamlet

-I can't decide if my master's degree should focus on creative writing or literature.

-that scares me.

-when it rains i feel more focused

-when it rains i feel more lazy and ready to cuddle into being unproductive.

-i like sitting in empty bath tubs after the water has drained. The porcelain stays warm long after the water has left.

-when smells sneak up on you, nostalgia burrowing into your soul, you go numb for a moment. 

-i love going numb. 

via Favim.com